Why we don’t achieve our goals ?


We have those goals, those hopes, we always do, we really want to achieve them enjoy success and join the realm of those who actually live the life of their dreams.

But we actually don’t do them, and year after year we realize we can’t do it, giving us a negative feedback about ourselves, we start to believe that we are losers and will always fails. Thus we stop dreaming and stay in mediocrity .Thinking that all these books and videos about people who succeed and reach their desired outcomes are fake and we end up losing hope.

So, is there a way out? Certainly there is, but let us first discuss we don’t achieve our goals or stick to our habits. The problem is simply we dream big dreams, we are interested in dramatic change and while we do so we neglect the effect of small baby steps. We need what we need  and we need it NOW .We need to be the most fit that we could ,we want to be rich ,we want a perfect partner .I mean really think about it .

Let us pick a simple scenario. Let us assume that today is the day you decide to add exercise  as a habit and eat healthy ,This is what you want and I believe you really do .but let us call it as it is .It has been at least one year since you made any kind of physical activity ,you have been eating Non-healthy food for more than you can remember .You have bad sleeping habits .Simply you’re doing everything that any sane man who cares about his own health would never do .And despite all this you believe you can snap a finger and flip everything your benefit doing everything  as it should be . Do you think you’re being realistic? Do you believe that change is gonna be that easy moving from the other extreme part of the spectrum to the other one? I don’t think so.

And this friend is the first part .To start to believe that radical change is by all means not possible. Not only that, let me tell you that I spent 1.5 years practically researching to find out a very shocking fact:” Your subconscious mind is not built in for change “.See? It is NOT, in case you did not notice ;).Yeah this is for real, do you think that your mind is going to help you change your old habits and build new positive habits? No it’s not .Why? Because building new habits is time consuming and requires a lot of efforts and our mind want to be lazy ,the human mind wants to continue doing what it’s already do thus is refuses any notion for change and becomes highly resistant to any call for change .

So what is the solution then? To sneak like a robber .Yes you heard me right .You need to add habits in a sneaky way, that your mind does not even notice it .I want you think of yourself as someone trying to get into a room and your subconscious is like an old man reading a newspaper or sleeping in that room, what is your mission at this specific case? Is to get in, try to put whatever you want to put on the desk without waking the old man up .Got it?

So how could you apply this in our real life? You add a very small part of the new activity in small quantities .As small as stupidly as possible.

Let us say you want to become fit .You don’t start by going to the gym every day after a whole year or may be 2 you did not hit the gym or even went in a simple walk or do a simple 5 min routine at home.

What you can do here is just add a 5-7 min exercises at home ,may be after you wake or before you got to work .And here is the kicker you don’t underestimate this activity and you also never go hardcore or increase the duration of your session until you make it as a ritual ,till you reach a point where you absolutely do it in a regular basis ,then and only then you think about increasing the time of your workout routine .When you reach a point where doing your work out is a habit as brushing your teeth when you wake up .

But What if I missed one or two times?

You have to know that your old programming is not going to leave you become that consistent with your new habit .Meaning you Will miss once or twice .It’s not gonna be like clockwork . So what should you do when this happen? You accept it. Get over it .And continue the next say or the next times. We are humans .This is called Life ,This is called business and stuff happens .

This is totally normal and accepted .Do not fail in the trap of trying to be perfect. Having that need to hit 100% of all your shots and whenever you miss one you give up. This is not gonna help you .And getting 50% of your goals certainly IS better than 0%.

Remember this .Success has be and continues to be defined as getting up one more time after you have been knocked down. So? You get back again on track .

This is the way, the human way .As There is no perfect way .

What am I doing?

I have been trying to be perfectionist all my life, missing most of my trials because I wanted to be perfect and I was waiting for the right moment, waiting to be ready. What did I find out? There no right time, and I will never feel I am ready. So I should start Now .Because the right time is NOW. I should be realistic, pick a practical simple routine I could actually follow and stick to.

And that’s what I am doing now. I am not gonna lie  and say I invented it .I got it from all super achievers .Post once or twice a week .Stick to it and you will get results .And Drum roll Decision taken .I started my podcast (Currently in Arabic soon will be in English ) on Sound cloud . I should post every Saturday and Tuesday. I am just getting started and have recorded and uploaded 3 episodes till the moment of writing this certain post.

What I am doing write now is another habit I am trying to develop .I got the plan from James Clear “the famous writer. He said he started writing a post on his blog years ago also 2 times a week. He had a promise to himself to post every Monday and Thursday he has to post a new article to his blog, no matter how long or short it is .How good or bad he thought.

I am now announcing that I am following on his footsteps .I am going to post also twice a week at the same days he used to post.

Guess What! What you are reading right now is the 1st post on this project .I will also have the same commitment and the same idea of not caring how long or short my article (I can tell it is long 🙂 How good or bad it is (You tell me what you think 😉  

Now you tell me what one thing you are going to start doing and what will be your simple and clear plan you put for yourself that you can follow and the beginning in order to get your feet wet in the game.

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Have a good day.

Eslam Talaat